By now you have come to realize that I breed babies yearly it seems. I feel as if I have hit the point of Motherhood status where I can offer fairly good advice to new moms. There are a list of things I would tell each one of them in order to help them maintain sanity through the first few years.However one in particular will keep them happy throughout life.
Don’t forget to love your Husband!
Trust me, I know it seems obvious and super simple. But it’s the hardest piece of advice to remember sometimes. Think about it ladies, your husband is a breed all his own. Nothing about him understands swollen feet,mood swings and the need to have baby do everything according to latest Mom Blogs. He understands YOU because he loves you! All the other stuff is like a foreign language to him.
When our babies enter the world, our whole outlook on life changes. The way we talk, eat, sleep and think change. We become different version of ourselves (hopefully better ones). Our men are only hoping to embrace this and keep up. Don’t shut them out.
I remember when we had our first baby and I was dead set on being the “perfect mom” or whatever the hell that was. I had to do everything my way, at my pace. Sometimes I forgot that my husband had a right to make the decisions too. I forgot that he was someone I could lean on when I was tired and stressed out. Instead, he became the one I yelled at and blamed.
No one warned me that the baby would consume my every waking moment, thought and actions. My husband sadly would end up taking second to our child. If he wanted to talk, we had to wait until the baby was asleep. If he wanted to cuddle, it had to be when I was finished taking care of the baby. And let’s not even talk about wanting to be intimate. HELL NO, I didn’t have time for that!!
I forgot to care about HIS needs as well.
Women take heed to this simple piece of advice. Your husband, is the one that will be with you long after the kids grow up and leave the house. He is the one you will turn to when you can’t quite take another minute of your teenage daughters mood swings. He will be there to laugh with you when the house seems to be caving in and there is nothing to do but find humor in it all.
Yes we are tired. Yes we are worn thin at the end of the day. Yes we seem to have no time to ourselves. But if you have someone who is willing to fall asleep next to you every night knowing that in the morning you may look like the Walking Dead….love him with all you have!!!!
A kiss, a hug, a wink or smile. A love note, a back rub or holding hands during an outing. These all go such a long way. They don’t take any time or effort and the reward is worth it. If we showed as much love to our husbands as we did to our new babies our marriages wouldn’t falter during these massive life stages.
Your husband and you are the foundation of the family you are building. Maintain that foundation with love and affection for one another. This way you can both show more love and affection to your children and they will see this between their parents as they grow up.
So yes,I would tell you the obvious as New Moms; sleep when the baby sleeps, dont read too many books on parenting, you don’t have to go vegan to raise a healthy child, and don’t forget to love your husband!
Meet Christina Joyce, Mama of 4 and blogger at Caffeine and Three
I have a tendency to refer to myself as a mother first, however I am learning to say, “I am a woman who raises A LOT of kids!” My life is full of chaos, laundry, homework and kids sports. I am fueled by coffee and home cooked meals. Family is the most important thing in my life. You could definitely say my personality is sarcastic, witty and full of head strong opinions. Nothing fuels my soul quite like writing about Motherhood, Marriage and Life as it happens to Me. Lastly, my name is Christina and I enjoy meeting other moms who don’t take themselves too seriously.