Did you know there are more than 35 million moms with children age 18 or younger in the United States alone? You would think that would make it easy for a gal to make a mom friend (even if she needs to be one in a million, there should be 35 great matches for you!), but sometimes it seems like there isn’t anyone who can relate! Sometimes it even feels impossible to meet moms. And why?
It all comes down to mom density. Those 35 matches could be anywhere in the country! More specifically, moms make up just over 10% of the American population. So, if you live in a city of a million people, there are 10,0000 moms – a pretty good selection, with reasonable odds that you’ll find someone you like. If you live in a small town, though, you only get 100 moms per 1,000 people in your town, and your perfect mom match might not live in your community. Moreover, regardless of where you live, your best mom pal could be very different from you. She could have kids the same age as yours, or much older or younger. She might live in a really posh neighborhood, or a really poor one. She might not look anything like you expect her to.
So how do you find that perfect mom friend? Think outside the box! There are lots of different ways to meet moms:
- Try the usual kid friendly spots – even if your kid has outgrown the park or the playground – remember, your mom match might be at a different phase in her motherhood career than you! Don’t be afraid to chat up a mom who might not be a perfect match with your kids (and remember, the older your kids get, the less impact those age differences will have on how well your kids get along)!
- Enlist the aid of your kids – have children who are old enough to babysit? Maybe your would-be best mom friend needs a sitter! Have you tried to connect with the parents of your kids’ close friends? Perhaps you could volunteer at a school event to connect with other helpful moms!
- Go to places where other women hang out – while moms are only 10% of the total U.S. population, they make up a whopping one in three within the adult female population. Join a women’s group or a book club, and talk about your kids!
- Get online – join Hello Mamas! if your best Mom friend doesn’t live in your town, maybe you can find her online. Especially with very small kids, it can be hard to get out of the house on any kind of reasonable schedule. Make an online buddy and you’ll still get the benefits of friendly support, but with less pressure to match someone else’s schedule, or even look presentable while you chat!