Before we start, let’s get something straight: We’re not talking about single moms looking for love – though that’s pretty stressful, too. This post is about moms trying to meet local moms for playdates, conversation, and the kind of companionship you can only get from someone who can look into your eyes and know exactly what you’re going through. Maybe you never realized how hard it is to meet moms.
Some moms, the very luckiest moms, find themselves with a big support network because their friends all have kids in the same age group or they met their mom network through pre-natal fitness and the new mom group at the hospital. They don’t need to go out of their way to meet moms. But plenty of mamas find themselves with tired, crying babies balanced on hips, busted dishwashers, and no one to call for some good old fashioned commiseration.
That’s usually when desperate moms try mom dating. Which has a lot in common with regular dating. Imaging looking across the slide to that super cool supermom with the two-year-old in mini biker jacket and trying to muster up the courage to say hi. Trying to meet local moms by joining activity groups or coffee clubs. Feeling the sting of rejection when the mom who seemed so enthusiastic about scheduling a playdate never calls.
It’s enough to make a mom put Sesame Street on repeat and lose herself in a novel! (Until high school graduation.)
Mom dating gets even more stressful when you’re a mama whose family falls outside of the supposedly picture perfect norm. It’s not a matter of anyone being unfriendly – just a failure to relate. To the issues surrounding prematurity or special needs or dietary concerns or blended families or whatever makes your family special. Sometimes you just want that “I get it” level of connection. How are you even supposed to find another family who gets it, anyway? In short, mom dating is hard.
Meeting local moms is hard. Every bit as stressful as awkward high school dating, in fact. The idea that you can just strike up a convo with the closest mama at the playground or school play and make a friend for life is the kind of big fib that gives moms anxiety. Does it happen? Occasionally, but mom dating isn’t the most reliable way to make friends with other moms. For that? You’re going to have to stick with us for a while. Until then, we’d love to hear how you make mom friends!