If there’s one piece of advice we have as veteran moms for new moms, it’s always: “Find mama friends.” While this was the last thing that we thought we needed as pregnant gals, it turned out that the only way we got through (and get through) the thick of it was by finding local moms who had kids the same age to speak baby talk with.
We’re not saying that you and your bestie are going to fall apart at the seems (you’re not), we’re just saying that if there’s ever a time to make room in your life for a new friend for life, it’s definitely when you’re a new mama.
Even in the big city, having a newborn can feel isolating. But like-minded parent friends can make the experience an opportunity to rediscover your city, share milestone moments and maybe even escape for a glass of vino at the end of a tough day.
And if you’re still thinking, “ugh, that’s so cheesy,” guess what? You’re about to be a new mama and you’re awesome…and so is your new soul mama that you haven’t met just yet. We’re stoked for you.
If it all stills feels a little too awkward, our friends at Hello Mamas will help take first date jitters out of the equation. Here, the founders of this mama-matching site give us 3 tips on finding new mama friends.
1. Meg Gerritson: Step outside of your comfort zone.
Making mom friends–especially for the first time–can feel like you’re on a blind date at a bar. It’s bizarre, totally awkward, and often overwhelming. That said, it really is SO worth the hard work once you find one or a few cool local mamas. And try not to focus so much on finding a mom just like you. Some of my best mom friends are my opposites and we hear the same from many mom friends who met via Hello Mamas. It may take time to figure things out, but if you can learn to appreciate your differences, it could very well be the perfect match.
2. Christa Terry: Ignore “rejection” because it’s probably not actually rejection.
Yes, that cool mom from the playground or that friend of a friend never did get in touch to plan a playdate, but why assume it’s you? She’s a mom, and since you’re a mom you know how hard it can be to remember where you put someone’s phone number. (Seriously, I have about 15 names in my phone who could be anyone or anyone’s mom. It can be hard to find the time to write an email or a text or make a call when there’s not an immediate need. That’s if you can even find the mental energy to welcome new people into your life this month. Being a mom takes a lot out of you, and sometimes making friends is the last thing on your to-do list. So if you’re feeling bummed that you didn’t connect, chalk it up to the busyness of motherhood, brush off your ego, move on, and keep putting yourself out there.
3. Julia High: Be yourself!
Too much work to try to impress people while keeping small children from concussions.
Seeking new mama or expectant mama friends? Check out Hello Mamas!
Co-founder and editor of Well Rounded NY Kaity Velez is a former menswear editor who cannot believe she was ever scared of being a mom. Currently residing with her toddler and fiancé in her beloved Brooklyn, she is kept in a constant state of awe by her little guy. You can often track her down at her local pie shop working on anything pregnancy and new mom-related. And trying to not to eat pie. At least not too much of it.
Well Rounded NY is an online destination for trendsetting mamas-to-be, providing inspiration and information that speaks to a cosmopolitan pregnancy.